For more about Allison and her books visit her website at For now, please relax and brace yourself for the occasionally coherent ramblings of Allison's mind.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Spam Alert: Reconnecting with my Ignored Fans

I know what some of you are thinking. Wait a second, she just published her second book and she’s talking about spam instead? I know, but since when have we been concerned about following logical patterns?

Ok, I have to apologize to some of you. If you’ve ever tried to comment on one of my posts, you know it requires an authorization process. (I’m speaking to those who submit comments on my website, not the blogspot version. Yes, I mirror the same posts on both. Yes, it’s because I only have twenty readers on each and I’m not about to lose half of them to save an extra three minutes.)

Please know that the authorization process has nothing to do with vetting your comments. I’m not filtering them, it’s the only way I can bar the dozens of spam posts I get each day. The thing is, the spammers are getting better. Sometimes it’s hard to filter out which comments are legit and which aren’t. Sorry if I ever deleted yours by accident.

As time has gone on, however, I realized that I’m not really being fair to the bots, They took the time to attack my site. If I’m not going to approve their comments, the least I can do is respond.
So, here. I’ll do even better than posting your comments. I’ll give you an entire blog entry.

From: Cinthia
Posted to: “My Opponent Hates Babies”
“Wow! Great to find a post konkcing my socks off!”

Dear Cinthia:
Thanks. I try. If I can konkc the socks off just one person with each post, I consider myself a success and my job complete. I take it you dabble in politics?

From: easy surveys for money
Posted to: “Weighing in on Generational Angst”
“If you want to make $20-$50/hour and up to $3500/month of your time working at
home part-time then this is the most important message you’re ever going to read…

It may sound hard to believe, but it’s true. There are thousands of companies out there who are willing to pay for your opinions regarding their products. This is an important part of product research, and they rely on people just like you for your honest opinion!

Imagine getting paid for doing things like:

- Trying out new menu items from popular restaurants
- Take short surveys about new cars that are coming out soon
- Give your opinion about new clothing and shoe designs
But here’s a problem, it’s very hard to find out best survey site and you probably can waste too much time but I just stumbled up website (link redacted) where this guy Jack revealed his secret source where he registered and taking surveys in his free time and earning $265 within 12h and $1440 just within 2 weeks

Click Here To read this amazing story : (link redacted)

Dear Easy Surveys:
Wow, kudos to Jack for sharing his secret. Personally, I’d probably keep it and make $795 within 12h and $4320 just within 2 weeks, instead. Then I could FINALLY buy an iPhone and MacBook like everyone else. Clearly, you don’t need basic writing skills to do this job, so that’s a plus, and I’m obviously an expert on new clothing and shoe designs so I can see this being a match made in heaven.

I have to be honest though, Easy Surveys. As exciting as this sounds, it might not be the most important message I ever read like you promised. I do find it fitting that you sent this to my post on Generational Angst and the struggle of young families versus the older generations to make ends meet relative to their expectations. Obviously, you connected with my thoughts and have done your best, like Jack, to make the world a little brighter. You’re a good man.

No, I’m not clicking that.

From: Nhlanhla
Posted to: “Dear Dr. Fortune Cookie: When Cookies Go Silent”
Wow Sandi thank you for stopping by and conientmmg on my post. I am rejoicing with you that God found you and your husband in His perfect timing, and that you are leading your family in the Lord. I clicked on your comment to come here and thank you for taking the time to leave such a sweet comment. I am so surprised that you featured my post right here on your blog! Thank you!In poking around your blog, I found we have a good bit in common. I’m sure we will visit each other many times. It’s great to meet a fellow homeschooling Christian sister!Have a lovely Valentine’s Day!-Allison

Dear Nhlanhla:
Who’s Sandi? Did I miss something? And why was she conientmmg on your post? Sorry about that. I hope I had nothing to do with it. Oh, ok, God put us together. Got it. Wait…what?  I don’t remember the part of my childhood where I was homeschooled. I was a sister though, to Jonathan, not you. Oh, I see I wrote this to myself. In honor of Valentine’s Day – in July. Apparently, we didn’t cover calendars in homeschooling.

From: Roberta
Posted to: “Jealous of Jessica (but not her power suits)”
my email adress is only a difefrent name so no one knows my real name but its safe wuth you okay so today i got a fortune saying you will conquer obstacles to achieve success. what does it mean? please reply to my email

Dear Roberta:
Oh, well, no, I don’t think so. And if you don’t know what that fortune means, I’m not sure what I could do to help you.

By the way, capitals and punctuation go a long way. Tell your friends.

From: Aoi
Posted to: “In Defense of Fashionistas (and Fashionistos)”
Hi Ari. She’s right about “it comes back, it repeats iseltf.” Clothes always do. What a beautiful lady who looks so full of life and seems so happy. You really know how to find them. Thanks for sharing. I did a post the other day about your blog and how enjoyable it is. Gave out your link so that other’s could come and enjoy too. Take care and thanks.

Dear Aoi:
Hi Aoi. Nice of you to drop in. My name’s not Ari, but that’s ok.

I don’t think I was there for that conversation. It’s not ringing a bell, but I agree with you that fashion trends tend to repeat themselves. That’s what you meant with your cryptic statement regarding the photo of the dead lady, right?

Please don’t give my link out to your friends. I don’t want to have to pay for a spam filter and I’m already on the cusp of needing one. Thanks, though.

From: Marvin
Posted to: “A Good Villain”
WOW !!! The “teasers” are fabulous. Can’t wait to see the rest. Jenna, you did a wuoedrfnl job, but then you had such beautiful subjects in Allison and Jesse. Thank you for capturing the true essence of them. It was great meeting you (again?) and having you as our guest. With love, Gail and Larry

Dear Marvin:
I haven’t hidden anything from you. Look around. Knock yourself out. It’s a little creepy that you’re implying I share an essence with a character from my novel, but as far as fake people go, he’s pretty cool so I guess I can live with that. I have to admit I’m not as impressed as you are by what Jenna has accomplished. Since Jesse’s true essence is the fact that he doesn’t exist, it’s probably not difficult to capture it. Well, then again, that’s nearly impossible so I take it back. What Jenna did is actually really impressive.

It was great meeting you too, Marvin, but no, I don’t think we’ve met before. Oh, I mean Gail. And Larry.

From: Trisna
Posted to: “Coffee Chat #1”
2011 Thanks, I have recently been saeichrng for information about this subject for ages and yours is the best I have discovered so far. But, what about the bottom line? Are you sure about the source?

Dear Trisna:
100% positive. I was there when I wrote it. I’m sorry your life is so dull that a post of me rambling random facts is a.) something you’ve been scouring the earth for,  and b.) was the best you could find with your massive efforts.

As for the bottom line, I’ll hook you up with my new friend “Easy Surveys for Money.” I bet he could help you with that. Now, that’s a source I can’t confirm. Let me know how that works out for you.

From: James
Posted to: “Allison: Acknowledging the Acknowledgments”
Several of these replies on this post are garbage, You should delete them.

Dear James:
I couldn’t agree more. Already done.

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