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For more about Allison and her books visit her website at http://www.allisonsimon.com/. For now, please relax and brace yourself for the occasionally coherent ramblings of Allison's mind.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Michael: Currently Forming a Committee for Sanity

Whose brilliant idea was it to let Allison take guitar lessons? I mean, come on. It was bad enough we had to listen to her play the piano and write her stupid songs all the time. So wait, I know, let’s get her a guitar! Great. Because now she can butcher the B chord in every room of the house. I really don’t think it’s ethical to make someone listen to “Wonderwall” so many times in one week. All I can say is I hope she slays it at her next lesson so we don’t have to hear it another six million times.

She’s also practicing her “blues improv” technique. Yeah, that’s about as delightful as it sounds. I’m thinking someone should tell her there’re more than 4 notes in the blues scale, but then she might actually try to play them. I don’t even want to imagine how that would work out.

And while we’re on the subject of complaining, why does everyone say cats are smart? I just watched the fat striped one eat a feather. Except it couldn’t do it. Do you think that stopped the cat? Nope, it just kept chomping away until it managed to swallow it. In my opinion, if something isn’t edible the first thirty times you try, a smart animal would decide it’s not edible. Eating feathers—not the behavior of a smart animal.

Ok, I feel better now. ….and there’s “Wonderwall.” Holy crap.

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